What is the most common regret in life?
I wish I had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
The power of expectations is vastly underestimated!
Parents may be the worst offenders. Children, including adult children, try to please their parents, even when the parent is completely clueless to their child’s unique identity and is an obviously twisted, self-consumed person. These people may think they love someone, but their actions reveal they are completely clueless about the true nature of love as they pervert it into something which is selfish and controlling, and the very antithesis of real love.
Women keep going back to abusive men, feeling as though they are responsible for his behavior. They reason, if they are good enough at fulfilling his expectations, he will not be abusive.
I once had an acquaintance who wanted me to enter into a venture with him. I carefully thought about and explained to him why I did not what to be personally involved and wished him well. He kept stalking me about it and eventually wrote terrible lies about me as a comment on my own blog. He continuously tried to squeeze me into his mold, so his venture could be successful.
The political rancor that poisons our nation is such that there is often a point of dissonance in our casual conversations. People will turn to you and think or say, I can’t believe you feel that way. My initial response is to rationally explain my position. If I don’t get anywhere with that, then my next instinct is to fight fire with fire and to respond in a pithy and somewhat insulting manner. Lately, a new way to respond has occurred to me. When asked how or why I take a particular stand, I respond, because I want to. If the relationship is one of true friendship and love, that will be enough. Now I am thinking of a more complete response, like, because I want to, Is that okay?
Let me try to summarize with a few pithy sayings of my own.
- When someone tries to control you, don’t play their game.
- Be a man! Be a woman! Do not let yourself be the object of someone else’s control!
- If someone is abusive to you, get out of the relationship!
- Don’t ever let anyone belittle you!
- Understand that God is at work within you. Follow that quiet voice. Be who you are intended to be.
- Don’t be ever be stopped by someone who tells your idea will be a failure or asks a bunch of questions that you don’t have good answers for. Consider their comments and make adjustments, if necessary, but don’t let them stop you!
- Unleash yourself, your true self upon the world!
Well said Glenn!
Thanks, buddy!